Today I almost quit my job. My boss thinks I should stop using AI, and my colleague quipped that I was a 20-year GS-12. While I didn’t find the quip offensive because we were all laughing and joking as we often do about needy travelers, it did make me think about how I’ve been in federal service for more than 20 years, and I’m only a GS-12. I chose not to petition for promotion this year because I was only five months into this new assignment, and I had decided after the feedback session with my boss that I should focus on learning my job and learning it well. My mind raced to the book written by Cal Newport, “So Good They Can’t Ignore You.” While I never read the book the sentiment stuck. In an age where people are constantly seeking more attention, more money, more status, more things, I think there’s something to be said for quietly learning your craft and allowing your work to speak for itself. Sure, people might argue that hard work never pays off. They might even say that it’s all about who you know, and while both may be true to some extent, the reality is that work makes us content (i.e., satisfied).
Still, my colleague’s quip gave me pause. Made me wonder if I should be trying to seek a promotion. I guess there's always that feeling like I'm leaving something on the table. It probably cost me nothing to petition other than answering two questions in less than 1,500 characters each. Also, I'm in a position where I could see people's pay grade and their age. Not because I'm looking for it, but it's necessary for processing. It would make anyone ask the question, “what am I doing with my life?”
The reality is that I’m getting older and because of my years of experience people might start to question why I haven't been promoted. A few years ago, I applied for an internal position in Boston, and I didn't get it. I was so mad because I thought I did quite well in the interview. I asked for feedback and it was some canned nonsense about communication. They didn't even want to give it to me at first. They were going back and forth between which office should send it. After talking with another colleague, she said something to me that changed my perspective. She said, "Joe, it's because they don't know you."
I had taken the news of not being offered the position in Boston personally. Kind of like when my more recent boss told me she wanted me to stop using AI because my work was beginning to sound like fluff. It made me realize that it wasn't personal, especially working in a big organization. It's easy to get lost in the shuffle. Funny thing is, that was around the same time that I ended up getting the job in London. A friend of mine once told me, too, that I should always assume the best. We never know what might be brewing behind the scenes.
London proved to be a turning point in my career. I had a boss who used to work in hospitality. He changed the way I saw my work. When I complained about the demands of the job, he said something simple, “Joe, make them feel special.” I didn’t fully understand it then. I do now, especially all the times he invited me to have lunch in the cafeteria to catch up. He was showing me what it was to care. My pastor gives us assignments as part of his Sunday School lessons. Most of them are short essay reflection questions, and I realized in doing many of them that God has been preparing me for the work He has for me to do when I didn't even realize it. My work as an administrative professional has been about helping people. I've often had to push back when people claim I'm being too helpful. They always like to argue that we just don't have the bandwidth. That's a big buzzword in our workplace culture, but I disagree. Even if I may not have always wanted to help, I realize looking out for my brother (and sister) goes a long way. That's been my differentiator over the years, and it has brought me more satisfaction than any amount of money I could earn or title I could have.
Maybe you’re in a similar boat. Wondering if what you’re doing matters. Asking yourself if you should be doing more. Buried under the weight of other people’s expectations. When really the only thing that matters is that we keep our eyes on God. Like David wrote in Psalm 25:15.
“My eyes are always on the LORD, for He rescues me from the traps of my enemies.”
We don’t have to envy what other people have or worry about whether God is going to provide. God is sovereign, and He is in control of our destiny. We just have to be willing to let go and trust God with the outcome. I’m looking ahead to what God will do next. That’s not me being passive but taking my unique abilities and focusing on sharpening them for the Kingdom.